Tuesday, June 12, 2007
The Seven Year Itch
"Look...either introduce me, or stop talking about her." I was finally calling Tom Killick's bluff. If this Cindy McDonald person was so right for me, let's quit wasting time. Not getting any younger here. So against his better judgement (did I mention that at the time he worked directly for Cindy's dad?), Tom finally relented and set up a Happy Hour at the Rio Grande Cafe in Reston, VA.
Monday, June 12, 2000. Unbeknowest to me at the time, that would be the day I would meet my future wife. Unbeknowest to her at the time, the last year of the 20th century was my unofficial "last chance" at finding a wife. I had thought to myself "if it doesn't happen this year, I'm gonna quit trying." Too much effort. So it's a good thing Tom didn't delay 7 more months!
Tuesday, June 12, 2007. Today is the seventh anniversary of the day we met. The dreaded "seven year itch." According to the National Center for Health Statistics, the median duration of couples who divorced between 1989 and 1990 was 7.2 years. I would imagine that statistic is relatively the same for any year over the past 20 years or so.
Why is this so? What is it about the 7 year mark? Why not 6? Or 8? Or 7 months (which it probably is in Hollywood)?
Consider this, from Dr. Nick Stinnett, PhD, a professor of marriage and family studies at the University of Alabama: "the success of a marriage (or other long-term commitment) can be directly linked to acts of kindness. That's as easy as sending flowers or taking the time to write a letter that expresses how you feel," he says. Make dates for just the two of you. This isn't being self-centered - it's essential to you and your family's well-being."
My father-in-law gave me the same advice in the form of this analogy: "marriage is like a gas tank...you have to fill it up (with acts of love, kindness, etc.) regularly."
For an equally important perspective, I think back to our Engaged Encounter weekend during our marriage preparation. One of the couples running the weekend gave a talk on the real meaning of marriage. The central point to their presentation that was if you get married, and expect to sustain that marriage, based on love alone you are fighting an uphill battle. Rather, marriage is a covenant with God that requires the total commitment of the couple no matter what the circumstances.
Back to the Seven Year Itch. I am feeling it definitely, but not in the conventional sense. These first seven years have left me looking forward eagerly to seven times seventy more. (OK, we're probably not going to live another 490 years, but you get the point.)
Happy Seven Year Itch, Sweetheart!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
My Little Big Man
Today is Brian's fourth birthday. Wow. Seems like just 1,461 days ago that I held him in my arms for the first time. Oh yeah...it was 1,461 days ago. But I still remember it like it was yesterday. We had a few tense moments leading up to his birth, but when they finally passed him to me all of that anxiety melted away instantly. Here was my little man. So worn out from the journey he could barely sustain a cry.
Over the coming months, we did everything people usually do with their first born. Lots of pictures (over 1,000 in his first year alone), videotape, etc. Heck, we even went to great lengths to take a bunch of pictures on the 17th of every month to chart his growth. Our live is great now with the three boys, but that was a special time -- just Mommy, Daddy, and Brian. I am so proud of how he has grown into a caring big brother.
My little big man. Four years old. Hard to believe. Happy Birthday Brian!
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Go P-Nats!
This summer has been characterized by many things, many of them big life-changing events...new job, sell house, by house, move hundreds of miles away.And then there are the Potomac Nationals. The Class A, Carolina League farm team of the Washington Nationals, the P-Nats call Richard G. Pfitzner Stadium ("The Pfitz") home. Located near Woodbridge, VA, the Pfitz is a great place to take the family on a Saturday night. "Real Baseball, Real Close" is their tag line. And it's true. Even the worst seat in the house is practically on top of the action. Add the smell of freshly-grilled meats, popcorn, and funnel cakes and you have a great night at the park enjoying our National Pasttime.
And then there are the fireworks. Done after every Saturday night home game. The perfect capper to a real American family outing.
On this night, we attended again with our extended family: David and Daniella (aka LaLa to those who can't quite put together all those letters.) Since our move to Florida was confirmed, we've been making an extra effort to see them more often. Three P-Nats games were part of that plan.
We've already researched minor league baseball in Melbourne. The Brevard Manatees are the Class A affiliate of the Milwaukee Brewers. They play in Space Coast Stadium, which is ironically the Spring Training home of the Washington Nationals.
So we can get our fix of minor league baseball for sure. But it will also surely not be the same going to games without the rest of the family, without David and LaLa. I'm sure we will get the question from the backseat: "are we going to see David and LaLa?" It will be very tough to answer that question a month from now without getting choked up.
Maybe they can take a road trip down next summer to "the Space", or whatever they call it. And we may have to visit the Pfitz in the future, for old times sake.
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